Life can feel like a battlefield when you’re carrying the weight of unmet expectations, financial struggles, and the deep yearning to create a better life for your children. For many Black urban entrepreneurs and hustlers, the grind feels like quicksand—you’re working hard, yet you still feel stuck, sinking deeper into frustration.
If this resonates with you, let me tell you something important: where you are now is not where you have to stay. You’ve got what it takes to transform your struggle into strength, your pain into purpose, and your dreams into a legacy.
Let’s unpack how you can shift from feeling stuck and defeated to unstoppable. This journey starts in your mind, flows through your spirit, and manifests in your hustle.
Step 1: Acknowledge the Pain Without Judgment
“I just feel like I should be further in life…”
That sentence holds so much weight, doesn’t it? It carries guilt, self-doubt, and a little shame. But here’s the first thing you need to do: give yourself grace.
Life might not look like what you expected right now, and that’s okay. What you’re feeling is valid. But don’t let those feelings define you. Acknowledge them for what they are—emotions. Kevin Gates once said, “You gotta stop thinking that people owe you something…including you.” That means stop thinking you owe yourself a perfect timeline. You’re human, and timelines can shift.
Exercise:
Take five minutes to write down everything weighing on your mind right now—every failure, every “should’ve,” every regret. Then, read it out loud and say, “This does not define me.” Repeat that until you believe it.
Step 2: Rewire Your Mindset
Feeling stuck is a result of the story you’re telling yourself. If you say, “I’m failing in every area,” your mind will find ways to confirm that. But if you shift that narrative to, “I’m in a season of growth, and I’m learning what doesn’t work,” your brain will start finding opportunities instead of obstacles.
Here’s how to rewire your mindset:
1. Catch the negative self-talk. Anytime you hear yourself thinking, “I can’t,” replace it with “How can I?” For example:
• Instead of: “I’ll never get out of this mess.”
• Say: “How can I take one step out of this situation today?”
2. Visualize the future. Spend 5-10 minutes every morning imagining your best self. See yourself as successful, happy, and free. Create that mental picture, and let it fuel your actions.
3. Anchor yourself in power. Think of a time when you overcame something difficult. Close your eyes, relive that moment, and remind yourself: If I did it before, I can do it again.
Step 3: Prioritize Spiritual Formation
Your spirit needs as much nurturing as your mind and body. When life feels chaotic, connecting to something bigger than yourself can bring clarity and strength.
Here’s the truth: Your spiritual foundation is what keeps you grounded when the world feels like it’s spinning out of control.
Try this:
• Meditation and Prayer: Spend 10 minutes a day in silence, focusing on your breath or praying. Ask for clarity, strength, and wisdom.
• Affirmations: Speak life into yourself. Say things like:
• “I am worthy of success.”
• “I am building a legacy for my children.”
• “Every struggle I face is making me stronger.”
• Journaling: Write down what you’re grateful for daily. Gratitude shifts your perspective from lack to abundance.
As Kevin Gates says, “I got two phones, one for the plug and one for the load.” Think of your spiritual life as your “plug” to recharge when you’re carrying life’s heavy loads.
Step 4: Break It Down—The Power of Micro Wins
The reason you feel stuck is because you’re trying to do too much at once. When you’re juggling parenting, finances, relationships, and self-improvement, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. The key is to break things down into micro wins.
Here’s how:
1. Choose one area to focus on. What’s the most pressing issue right now? Is it finances? Your mindset? Your health? Start there.
2. Set one small goal each day. Instead of saying, “I need to fix my finances,” start with, “I’ll save $5 today.” Small actions build momentum.
3. Celebrate progress. Every step forward—no matter how small—is proof you’re moving.
Example:
If you’re struggling financially, start by tracking every dollar you spend this week. That’s it. Don’t overcomplicate it. Once you know where your money is going, you can take the next step.
Step 5: Build Your Tribe
You cannot do this alone. Feeling stuck often comes from isolation. Surrounding yourself with the right people can change everything.
Here’s what to do:
• Find mentors or role models. Look for people who’ve been where you are and have overcome it. Their stories can inspire you.
• Join a community. Whether it’s a church group, a business mastermind, or a group of friends who uplift you, being part of a community gives you strength.
• Ask for help. There’s no shame in needing support. If you’re struggling with something, reach out to someone who can help.
Step 6: Start Thinking Legacy, Not Lack
When you’re stuck, it’s easy to focus on what you don’t have. But as a parent, your mindset shapes not just your future but your children’s as well. Start thinking about what you want to leave behind for them.
Legacy thinking looks like this:
• Long-term goals over short-term fixes. Instead of spending $50 on something you don’t need, invest it into savings or a side hustle.
• Teaching your children resilience. Share your struggles with your kids in an age-appropriate way. Show them how you’re overcoming them.
• Building wealth and wisdom. Start learning about entrepreneurship, investing, and personal growth, so you can pass that knowledge on to your children.
As Kevin Gates says, “Don’t get mad at me for being the best me I can be.” Show your children the best version of yourself, even if it’s a work in progress.
Step 7: Hustle Smarter, Not Harder
Sometimes, you’re stuck because you’re putting energy into the wrong things. It’s time to work smarter, not harder.
Ask yourself:
1. What’s one thing I can do today that will have the biggest impact on my life?
2. Am I wasting time on things that don’t move me closer to my goals?
3. What resources do I already have that I can leverage?
Pro Tip:
Create a simple plan for your day. Focus on three tasks that align with your goals. When you focus on what matters most, you’ll see results faster.
Step 8: Turn Pain into Purpose
Your struggle is not just for you—it’s for your children, your community, and anyone else who will be inspired by your story. Every trial you’ve faced is a tool to help someone else.
Here’s how to turn your pain into purpose:
1. Share your story. Be open about where you’ve been and how you’re growing.
2. Help others. Whether it’s giving advice, mentoring, or simply encouraging someone else, your pain can become someone else’s hope.
3. Build something that lasts. Whether it’s a business, a movement, or a legacy, let your struggle fuel your creation.
Final Thoughts
You are not defeated—you’re being refined. You’re not stuck—you’re being prepared. Every great story has a moment of struggle before the breakthrough. This is your moment to decide who you’re going to become.
Kevin Gates said it best: “I’ve been broke before, but I’m rich mentally.” Your mindset is your greatest weapon. Use it to rebuild, to rise, and to reclaim your future—not just for you, but for your children.
You’ve got this. Now it’s time to put in the work and build the life you’ve been dreaming of.
Call to Action:
If you’re ready to take the next step, start today by choosing one action from this blog. Share your progress and connect with a community of hustlers like you who are rewriting their stories. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey—we’re all in this grind together.
Ttyl,
Myron
P.S. Forgive me for all the Kevin Gates quotes 😜
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